Izifundo ngokungaguquguqukiyo bonisa ukuba amadoda nabafazi abahlukanga kakhulu kwiimfuno nakwiimfuno zabo. Mhlawumbi kukho iyantlukwano, kodwa isayensi ayifumananga ndlela yokulinganisa.Iingcali ezithetha ngalo mbandelayamkele ukuba iyantlukwano iyaqhubeka kwaye iyasebenza ukuvala umsantsa phakathi kwamadoda nabasetyhini, ukunceda abantu basetyhini ukuba baqonde ukuba amadoda afuna ntoni kwaye ayintoni na kubudlelwane. Ngelixa iimfuno zomntu zizimeleyo ngokukodwa, kukho izikhokelo ngokubanzi zokuba yintoni umntu ayifunayo kubudlelwane.
Izidingo Zamadoda Kubudlelwane
Izidingo zamadoda kubudlelwane nabasetyhini ziyahluka ngokuxhomekeke kwiUbume bobudlelwanehi enye. Kukho izikhokelo ngokubanzi ezinokuthi zisebenze nakweyiphi na imeko yobudlelwane, ukusuka ukuthandana ukuya emtshatweni.
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Amadoda afuna isini esikhulu
Ngoku ka UGqr. Julayi Slattery , isini siphezulu kuluhlu xa sijonga into efunekayo ngamadoda kubudlelwane. Ayisiyiyo kuphela into yokuba amadoda afune isondo, kodwa afuna isini esilungileyo, hayi isini esenziwa ngaphandle kwesibophelelo okanye ityala. Ugqirha Slattery ucacisa ukuba isini yinxalenye engenakuchazeka yendoda ngokwempilo yomzimba, yeemvakalelo kunye nokomoya:
ixabisa malini inyickel yenyathi
- Ngokwasemzimbeni, amadoda anesidingo sebhayoloji sokukhululwa ngokwesondo.
- Ngokweemvakalelo, amadoda, njengabafazi, afuna ukuziva enqweneleka kwiqabane labo.
- Ngokomoya, kubudlelwane, amadoda nabafazi kufuneka baphonononge unxibelelwano lwabo omnye komnye.
Amaxesha amaninzi, abantu basetyhini kunye nabesilisa bayahluka kwimikhwa yesondo ngenxa yeemfuno zobomi bemihla ngemihla. Abasetyhini bajolise ekukhuliseni usapho kunye nokulinganisa umsebenzi, kwaye amaxesha ngamaxesha, isondo sinokuthatha isihlalo sokubuyela kwezinye izibophelelo zobomi. Ugqirha Slattery ucebisa ukuba iingxaki kubudlelwane ziyavela xa abasetyhini bengayamkeli le nto yobudlelwane njengemfuno ngokuchasene nomnqweno.
Ugqirha Slattery ucebisa ukuba ukuba ungumfazi oziva ngathi ukuqhuba kwendoda yakhe ngesondo kugqwethiwe okanye kungcolile, kuya kufuneka ujonge ukuba kutheni ujonga isondo ngokucekisa, endaweni yokuba ibeyindalo kwaye iyimfuneko kubudlelwane phakathi kwendoda kwaye umfazi.
Amadoda afuna uMsa
Kuhlala kucingwa ukuba amadoda awadingi ukukhatywa okanye ezinye iimpawu zomzimba zothando. Nangona kunjalo, kutsha nje ukufunda ibonakalise ukuba amadoda afuna uthando kanye njengabafazi. Abaphandi bamangaliswa kukufumanisa ukuba amadoda anelisekile ngakumbi kubudlelwane apho amaqabane ayethandana. Umahluko phakathi kwamadoda nabasetyhini, kufunyenwe isifundo, yayikukuba abantu basetyhini babethanda ukuziva bonelisekile ngokwesondo xa uthando luyinto eqhelekileyo kulwalamano.
Amadoda afuna indawo
Nawuphi na umntu olandela ubudlelwane obuphilileyo ufuna indawo yakhe kumaxesha ngamaxesha. Amadoda awahlukanga. Ngamanye amaxesha, badinga ixesha elincinci lokuba bodwa. Le ngcamango, ngelixa ibonwa njengomehluko phakathi kwesini, inokusebenza nakwabasetyhini. Umzekelo, ngaba ufuna umyeni wakho akunyanzele ukuba ahambe nawe xa uyokulala nentombazana yakho? Ukusekaimida yobuqu esempilweniyeyona nto iphambili kulo naluphi na ulwalamano olusempilweni.
Amadoda kufuneka anelise uMfazi wabo
Amadoda aziva onwabile xa ekwazi bavuyise umfazi wabo . Inento yokwenza nokunika kwaye uthathe ubudlelwane. Xa indoda nomfazi kulwalamano ubuncinci bezama ukonwabisa omnye nomnye, kuhamba indlela ende kuthando kunye nenkathalo abayibonisayo omnye komnye.
Amadoda aziva esi sidingo ahlala engabantu abajolise engqondweni nasemphefumlweni ekusekeni naseukugcina ubudlelwane bexesha elide, kwaye bazibandakanye nokuziphatha okunempilo ukukhuthaza impumelelo yobudlelwane.
Amadoda afuna ukuqondwa
Kwakhona, oku kuya kubafazi nabo. Nangona kunjalo, abasetyhini kufuneka baqonde ukuba ulindelo lwamadoda, ngokusekwe kwiimfuno zabo zeemvakalelo, zahlukile kulindelo lwabasetyhini kubudlelwane. Indoda iyathanda ukwazi ukuba ungamthemba kwaye uthembele ngaye, uyamxabisa, umhloniphe, uyayixhasa kwaye uyayivuma into ayenzayo, nokuba ukwicala lakhe.
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Amadoda afuna ukuhlonitshwa
Ukuhlonitshwa, ngenxa yendoda, kuthetha ukuba unokholo kwinto akwaziyo, utshilo ingcali yobudlelwane ULaura Doyle . Intlonipho yinxalenye ebalulekileyo yokuzixabisa komntu kwaye ibandakanya ukumxelela nokumbonisa ukuba ucinga ukuba ulumkile kwaye unobuchule. Gcina ukhumbula ukuba ukuba nolwazelelelo akufani nokuba nembeko kwindoda.
Amadoda afuna ukunconywa
Nangona amadoda amaninzi ebonisa amandla, bahlala bexhalaba ngokufihlakeleyo ukuba abayinqumli kuzo zonke iinkalo zobomi. Ukuqinisekiswa kunye nendumiso ethile Ukusuka kwisithandwa kunika abafana imvakalelo yokukhuseleka kunye nokuzithemba kubudlelwane babo nangaphandle kwayo. Ukuva nje 'enkosi' rhoqo kwizenzo ezincinci kunokuhamba indlela ende yokwenza ukuba indoda izive ilungile ngaye nangobudlelwane bakho.
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Amadoda afuna uKhuseleko lweemvakalelo
Ngenxa yeengxaki zentlalo, amadoda ahlala eneendawo ezininzi ezikhuselekileyo, ezikhuselekileyo abanokuthi baveze iimvakalelo zabo. Ungu indawo ekhuselekileyo yendoda yakho kwaye kufuneka azi ukuba xa sele ekulungele ukuvula ngokupheleleyo, uya kuba nokuqonda kwaye uvule. Kuya kufuneka azi ukuba angazinqumla iimvakalelo zakhe ngakuwe ngaphandle koloyiko lomgwebo okanye ukuhlekwa.
Izidingo Zamadoda Kwimitshato
Encwadini, Iimfuno zakhe, iimfuno zakhe , umbhali uWillard Harley ucebisa ukuba niniImitshato iyawohloka, Kungenxa yokuba izibini aziziva ngathi zenze xa ziqala ukudibana. Indlela yokuphumeza oku, u-Harley uthi, kukuhlangabezana neemfuno zomntu ngamnye ngokweemvakalelo.
Nangona kunjalo, iimfuno zeemvakalelo zamadoda zahlukile kwezabafazi. Njengoko u-Harley esitsho, ezi mfuno zichasene, ezikhokelela kunxibelelwano olungelulo kunye nokungaxabisi iinzame zeqabane. Ukwalumkisa ukuba nganye yezi mfuno ayinakusetyenziswa kuyo yonke indoda, kodwa kufuneka ithathwe njengesikhokelo ngokubanzi. Ngamanye amaxesha, abantu basetyhini banokwabelana ngeemfuno ezifanayo nezamadoda, kodwa banokwahluka kuluhlu lwezinto eziphambili ngokubekwa.
Nazi iimfuno ezintlanu zeemvakalelo zamadoda ezikhokelela ekubeni bazive bonelisekile emtshatweni:
- Amadoda kufuneka azive ethandwa kwaye enesidima.
- Amadoda kufuneka azive enomtsalane.
- Amadoda kufuneka abenobuhlobo kwaye enze izinto namaqabane abo.
- Amadoda kufuneka azalisekiswe ngokwesondo.
- Amadoda kufuneka azive exhaswa.
Izikhokelo, endaweni yeMithetho
Ngelixa ukuqonda kwamadoda nabasetyhini ngeemfuno zobudlelwane babo kunokwahluka, kubalulekile ukugcina engqondweni ukuba ezi zizikhokelo ngokubanzi endaweni yemithetho enzima, engagungqiyo yokuyisebenzisa. Oku akunakusebenza kuye wonke umntu okanye isibini, njengoko watsho uHarley. Umbono kukuthatha ezi zikhokelo kwaye uzisebenzise njengezixhobo zeukuzifumanisa ngokwakho, kunye nokufunda ukuba zeziphi iimfuno zomntu wakho, kwaye ziyafana okanye zahlukile kwezakho.
