Iingcebiso ezili-11 ezisebenzayo zokujongana noMntwana ongevayo

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KWELI NQAKU

Ngaba ukuchasa koMntwana siSigaba?
Yintoni Ebangela Ukungahloneli Kwabantwana Abasakhasayo?
Xa Ufanele Uzixhalabise Ngokungahloneli Kwabantwana Abasaqalayo?
Ujongana Njani Nomntwana Oziintloni?

Ukubukela umntwana oselula esala ukulandela imiyalelo kwaye exambulisana nabantu abadala kunokwenza abazali bangazithembi. Kodwa ukuba nomntwana oselula odelelayo akusoloko kuthetha ukuba ukhulisa umntwana wakho omncinane ngendlela engafanelekanga. Endaweni yoko, olu tshintsho kumntwana osakhulayo ekufuneka uluqonde.

Ubuncinci kuxa umntwana efumana umtsalane wokuzimela okokuqala. Ngaxeshanye, bafumana utshintsho oluninzi lomzimba kunye nentlalo-ntle abangakwaziyo nokuyiqonda. Kubangelwa yingxubevange yezi zinto edla ngokudala inkcaso, edla ngokuba yeyokwexeshana. Noko ke, ukuba umntwana wakho ubonakalisa iimpawu zokuchasa okungapheliyo, ingxaki isenokuba yenye into.

Funda ukuze ufunde ukuba kutheni umntwana oselula ejika edelela, iingcebiso zokuyilawula, kwaye xa ukuchasa kubantwana abancinci kuyinkxalabo.

Ngaba ukuchasa koMntwana siSigaba?

Ewe, ukuchasa abantwana abasahambayo kudla ngokuba kokomzuzwana kwaye kwenzeka ngexesha lesigaba sobuntwana. Ngokutsho kweengcali, ukuchasa, ukuxhathisa, kunye nenkani kubantwana abancinci kunokuba yinto ephawulekayo ukususela kwiminyaka emibini. (Nye) . Uninzi lwabantwana abasacathulayo baqalisa ukucaphuka xa beneenyanga ezili-18 ubudala, kodwa ihambo evakalala iqala ukusuka kwiinyanga ezingama-24 okanye kwiminyaka emibini. (Mbini) . Umntwana oselula usenokukhula kwindlela yokuziphatha xa sele elungele ukuya esikolweni eneminyaka emine xa ebonisa intsebenziswano engcono.

Yintoni Ebangela Ukungahloneli Kwabantwana Abasakhasayo?

Ukubonakalisa inkcaso akuthethi ukuba kukho into engalunganga ngomntwana osemncinci okanye kwizakhono zakho zobuzali. Yindlela yomncinci yokusebenzisa inkululeko yabo entsha kunye nokuvavanya umhlaba ngesizathu kunye nesiphumo. Apha ngezantsi kukho izizathu ezimbalwa zokuba kutheni abantwana abancinci bebonisa ukuziphatha okudelelayo (Nye) .

1. Ukuziqonda ngcono

Umntwana oselula uyaqonda ukuba bangumntu, onokuba nempembelelo ngokuzimeleyo. Nangona kunjalo, abaqondi ukuba basenengqondo ekhulayo kunye nezakhono zomzimba. Ngoko ke, nayiphi na inkcaso ephakanyiswa ngumzali ngalo naliphi na inyathelo ivunywa ngokudelela okanye ngenkani.

2. Umdla wendalo

Umntwana osakhasayo uzele kukufuna ukwazi, yaye ihlabathi sisifundo sabo sovavanyo. Kungokwemvelo ukuba bavavanye imida yemithetho nendlela abanokusabela ngayo kwabo banyamekela abaguli, njengabazali.

Ukungathobeli yindlela yabo yokumisela ukuba bangawanweba kangakanani amaphiko abo ngaphambi kokuba babekwe phantsi. Qaphela ukuba umntwana oselula uyenza ngokwemvelo ngaphandle kweenjongo ezimbi.

3. Izakhono ezingcono zomzimba kunye neengqondo

Umntwana oneminyaka emibini ubudala ufumana inkululeko kuzo zonke iinkalo, kuquka nokushukuma komzimba. Umntwana wakho ohambahambayo uphantse enze nayiphi na intshukumo yomzimba, ukusuka kwitiptoeing ukuya ekubalekeni ebaleni. Izakhono zonxibelelwano nazo ziyaphuculwa kwaye umntwana oselula ngoku ekwazi ukuqonda imiyalelo elula kunye nenjongo yayo.

Izithintelo ezimbalwa kunye nobuchule obungcono bonyusa ukuthambekela kwendalo ukuchasa yonke imida kwaye bahambe ngendlela yabo, nokuba ayifanelekanga. Kungokwemvelo ukuba umntwana oselula abonakalise inkcaso xa abazali bengenelela ukulungisa ukhetho lomntwana.

Xa Ufanele Uzixhalabise Ngokungahloneli Kwabantwana Abasaqalayo?

Uninzi lweziganeko zokuchasa abantwana abasaqalayo aziyonto yokukhathazeka ngayo. Nangona kunjalo, kunokubakho iimeko apho ukuziphatha okudelelayo kunokuxhalabisa. Dibana nogqirha wabantwana okanye isazi ngengqondo yabantwana ukuba umntwana ongevayo ubonisa ezi flegi zibomvu zilandelayo (3) .

Ukucaphuka rhoqo
Ukungathobeli okungapheliyo kudla ngokukhatshwa lugonyamelo
Ukwala rhoqo ukulandela imiyalelo yomntu omdala
Ngalo lonke ixesha ubuza imibuzo, ngakumbi ngobundlongondlongo
Ukwenza izinto ngabom ukucaphukisa umntu omdala
Ukwaphula imithetho okanye ukuchasa igunya kwindawo yokugcina abantwana okanye kwezinye iindawo
Ukuthetha krwada okanye ngqwabalala kubantu abadala okanye kumntu onegunya
Ukuthetha ukuziphindezela okanye ukuziphindezela

Bhalisa

Ukubonakaliswa okungapheliyo kweeflegi ezibomvu kunokubonisa imiba yokuziphatha ephantsi, njenge-oppositional defiant disorder (ODD). Akukho sizathu esinye sokuba kutheni umntwana enokuba ne-ODD. Kungathatha uvavanyo oluninzi olwenziwa yingcali yokuziphatha yabantwana ukumisela ngokuchanekileyo ubukho be-ODD kumntwana osakhulayo. Ngoko ke, musa ukothuka xa umntwana wakho ebonisa naluphi na uphawu. Kwiimeko ezininzi, kusenokwenzeka ukuba ibe yindlela yokuziphatha yethutyana kwaye inokusonjululwa ngongenelelo olufanelekileyo.

Ujongana Njani Nomntwana Oziintloni?

Abazali banokuhlangabezana ngokulula neemeko ezininzi zehambo edelelayo ekhaya. Apha ngezantsi kukho imilinganiselo ecetyisiweyo onokuthi uyithathele ingqalelo ukunciphisa inkcaso kubantwana abaselula kwaye ubenze basebenzisane ngakumbi (4) .

Thetha nomntwana:Unxibelelwano ngundoqo xa ukhulisa umntwana. Ibanceda baqonde imithetho esisiseko kunye nemida echazwe kwangaphambili. Umzekelo, ukuba umntwana uhlala esenza isenzo esiyingozi kwabanye, benze baqonde ukuba kubuhlungu kwaye kubangela intlungu enkulu komnye umntu.

Chonga isiqalo:Abanye abantwana abasafundayo banokubonisa ihambo edelelayo kuphela kwiimeko ezithile okanye ngelixa benxibelelana nomntu othile. Qinisekisa unobangela onokuba ngunobangela kwaye ulungise. Umzekelo, ukuba umntwana oselula ubonisa inkcaso xa exelelwa ukuba ayeke ukudlala ngento yokudlala, unokubonelela ngezinye iindlela okanye unxibelelane nemida yexesha ngaphambi kokubonelela ngento yokudlala.

Misela inkqubo:Nika ixesha elimiselweyo lomsebenzi kwaye uwenze ngexesha elifanayo yonke imihla. Iya kuvumela umntwana osakhasayo ukuba azi ixesha elichanekileyo lomsebenzi, ukunciphisa amathuba okuchasa kunye nokucaphuka xa ecelwa ukuba ayeke.

Cacisa izizathu ezibangela le mithetho:Xelela umntwana wakho oselula ukuba kutheni isiqhelo kunye noqeqesho lubalulekile kwaye zisigcina njani singekho engozini. Ngokomzekelo, chaza ukuba ukugijima kwizinyuko kunokwenza uhambo olunye, olukhokelela ekuweni kakubi, okuya kwenza kube nzima ukudlala .

Nikeza ukhetho olulula:Nika ukhetho oluvumela umntwana osahambayo ukuba atshintshe ukusuka kumsebenzi ngokuthe ngcembe. Ngokomzekelo, endaweni yokucela umntwana ukuba ayeke ukudlala ngokukhawuleza kwaye alale, bacele ukuba bakhethe ibali lokulala okanye i-pajama yabo yobusuku njengokhetho. Inokuvela njengokhetho olungenagunya kwaye iya kwenza kube lula kumntwana osahambayo ukwamkela ukuba lixesha lokulala .

Sukuthethisa ngokukhawuleza:Ukusabela kwangethuba kunye nokwalelwa kuya kwenza umntwana oselula athambekele ngakumbi kwiindlela zokuziphatha ezithile ngenxa yokufuna ukwazi. Kuya komeleza umdla wokwazi ukuba kutheni beyekiswa ukwenza into ethile. Ngamanye amazwi, ungasoloko uthi Hayi. Ukuba izenzo zomntwana osakhulayo azibangeli monakalo, kusenokungabikho mfuneko yokuba zisoloko ziwanqanda.

Seta imithetho eneziphumo ezifanayo:Ezinye iindlela zokuziphatha zinokuba yingozi kakhulu ukuba ungazivumela ngaphandle kokuchasa ngokukrakra komntwana wakho. Kwiimeko ezinjalo, misela imigaqo kunye nemiphumo yokuchasa imigaqo. Misela iziphumo ezilula ezisebenza ngakumbi kunobunzima. Imizekelo embalwa iyakunceda imini yonke ngemisetyenzana yasekhaya, uhambo lwangokuhlwa olusisinyanzelo nabazali, okanye ukucoca zonke izinto zokudlala. Usenokunikezela ngezigqibo ezikhawulezileyo, njengokucela uxolo komnye umntu okanye ukwanga umntakwenu okanye umhlobo ukuba umntwana uye wabakhathaza.

Umzekelo wokuziphatha kakuhle:Abantwana bafunda ngokujonga indlela yokuziphatha yabanye. Ngoko ke, bathathe inxaxheba kwimidlalo okanye kwimisebenzi yabo ukuze babonise ukuziphatha kakuhle. Bafundise iindlela zokuhlonipha imithetho ngokubalinganisa kwimidlalo nakwimisebenzi.

Ncoma isimilo esihle:Ukudumisa umntwana ngokuziphatha kakuhle yindlela efanelekileyo yokuqinisa ukuziphatha kakuhle. Ngalo lonke ixesha ubona umntwana ehlonipha imithetho okanye esenza into elungileyo ngaphandle kokudelela, mncome ngamazwi anjengokuthi, Wenze kakuhle, ndiyazingca ngawe, okanye Ungoyena ubalaseleyo. Unokubonelela ngemivuzo elula, efana nezincamathelisi.

Nikeza ngendawo ekhuselekileyo yovavanyo:Vumela umntwana ukuba ajonge kwaye avavanye ihlabathi elimngqongileyo phantsi kweliso. Iyakwanelisa umdla womntwana oselula kunye nokuzimela ngelixa ingabanyanzeli ukuba bachase imida kwaye benze izinto eziyingozi. Ukuhlola kunokuba yimisebenzi elula ejikeleze indlu. Imizekelo embalwa kukuxuba umxube wekeyiki ekhitshini nabazali, ukulungisa iincwadi kunye nokusonga iimpahla kwindawo yokugcina abantwana, okanye ukunceda ilungu losapho egadini. Izinto ezenziwa kulungiselelo oluphantsi kolawulo zenza umntwana azive ebandakanyeka ngelixa ikuvumela ukuba ulawule.

Qinisekisa iimvakalelo zomntwana wakho omncinci:Abantwana baziva bekhuselekile xa beviwa yaye beqondwa. Xa umntwana wakho omncinci ejongene neemvakalelo ezinamandla, hlala kwaye umamele. Kunokuba ubacele ukuba bayeke ukukhala, baxelele ukuba kulungile ukulila, kwaye bangabelana nawe ngeengxaki zabo. Kunokuba uwubeke ecaleni umbandela, yiba novelwano kumntu omncinane uze ubanike isicombululo. Kuya kubanceda bazi ukuba banokufikelela kuwe xa ucinezelekile endaweni yokukuchasa.

Ukungathobeli kukuziphatha okuqhelekileyo ngexesha lokukhula okunokulawulwa ngemilinganiselo efanelekileyo. Khumbula ukuba ungazibeki tyala wena okanye umntwana wakho ngaloo nto. Ngokuqhelekileyo kukuziphatha kwendalo, kwaye umntwana oselula akanako ukulawula kuyo. Njengoko umntwana wakho ekhula, ufunda ukusebenzisana nabanye, yaye kuba lula ukuqiqa nabo. Noko ke, ukuba ubona iimpawu ezothusayo, ezinjengokuchasa ngokuchasa, musa ukuthandabuza ukuthetha nogqirha okanye isazi ngengqondo.