Iimpawu kunye nokuziphatha okuhambelana nokunxulumana nobomi baphakathi ebudeni ngokuqinisekileyo kunokuba njalokukhokelela kuqhawulo mtshato. Nokuba ujongene nengxaki yobomi obuphakathi, okanye iqabane lakho, kubalulekile ukuba uqonde ukuba yintoni ingxaki yobomi bokubakho, yintoni ebangela oko, kunye nendlela onokuthi ngayothintela umtshato wakho ekuqhekekeningenxa yayo.
Njani ukuba iMidlife Crises ibangela uqhawulo mtshato
Ingxaki yobomi obuphakathi lixesha lomntu notshintsho olunokuthi luhambisane neempawu ezingathandekiyo ezinokubangela isimilo kunye nokuziphatha okungafunekiyo kunye neengcinga. Oku kungonwabi kunokubangela ukubulawa kwemicimbi yomtshato kunye neyolwalamano enokuthi ikhokelele kuqhawulo mtshato. Kuba amaqabane afumana ingxaki yobomi bangemva kwexesha lokurhoxa anokurhoxa, acaphuke ngokulula, kwaye afune utshintsho olukhulu kubomi, iqabane lakhe langoku linokushiyeka liziva lididekile, libuhlungu kwaye liphelelwe lithemba.
Amanqaku afanelekileyo- Indlela Yokumelana Nokuzisola Ngoqhawulo-mtshato
- Buyisela umtshato emva koqhawulo mtshato
- Ngaba Ukwahlukana Kukulungele Ukutshata?
Yintoni iCrisis yobomi obuPhakathi?
Ingxaki yobomi baphakathi ebuntwaneni inokuhlala ukusuka kwiinyanga ezininzi ukuya kuthi ga kwiminyaka elishumi. Ngeli xesha, omnye ubonakalisa umva kwisiqingatha sokuqala sobomi babo kwaye ujongana nokufa okunxulunyaniswa nokungena kwisiqingatha sesibini sobomi babo. Ukuba uyazibuza ukuba ingaba ujongene nengxaki yobomi obuphakathi, okanye ukuba iqabane lakho linengxaki yobomi baphakathi, kukho imiqondiso kunye neempawu ekufuneka uzijongile. Ngaphandle kokuba kukwiminyaka yobudala engama-45 ukuya kuma-65, iimpawu kunye neempawu zengxaki yobomi baphakathi ebuntwaneni kunokubandakanya:
- Ukunyamezela ngokuzisola okudlulileyo
- Andiqinisekanga ukuba loluphi ulwalathiso ongena kulo
- Ukufuna ukwenza utshintsho olukhulu kubomi, kodwa ungazi ukuba ungaqala ngaphi
- Kunzima ukugxila
- Guqula ukutya kunye nokulala
- Ukonyusa iimpawu zoxinzelelo kunye / okanye uxinzelelo
- Ukuqwalaselwa ngobutsha kunye nokulungiswa ngokukhawuleza ukujonga okanye ukuziva umncinci
- Izigqibo ezingxamisekileyo
- Irhoxisiwe kwabanye
Ukuba wena okanye umntu omthandayo uneengxaki zokuzenzakalisa okanye ukonzakalisa abanye,funa uncedongoko nangoko.
Ingxaki yobomi obuphakathi xa kuthelekiswa noTshintsho lwasebusuku
Ngelixa ingxaki yobomi baphakathi kubomi ingadweliswanga njengesi sifo esisemthethweni Incwadana yokuchonga kunye neStatics V , inokuhamba kunye nokuphazamiseka kwengqondo enye okanye nangaphezulu, ezinokuthi zibe nzima ngakumbi kweli xesha lotshintsho. Ngokungafaniyo notshintsho kubomi baphakathi ebusheni, ingxaki yobomi baphakathi ebuntwini inokuzaliswa kukuphazamiseka ngokweemvakalelo kwaye kunokwenzeka ukuba ibe kukunxibelelana ngokusesikweni kwempilo yengqondo. Ngelixa abanye besithi ingxaki yobomi obuphakathi iyafana nokutshintsha kobomi obusebusuku, igama elithi 'ingxaki' libonisa ukuba omnye ngumzabalazo wokusebenza. Ukuphazamiseka kwengqondo okunokuhamba nengxaki yobomi baphakathi kubandakanywa:
- Ukusetyenziswa kweziyobisi kunye / okanye utywala
- Ukuphazamiseka koxinzelelo
- Ukuxhalaba
- Yongeza kwinkcazo yeempawu zokuphazamiseka kubuntu
Xa umntu ephakathi kwesithintelo sobuqu, bahlala bejolisa ngakumbi amandla kubo, anokonakalisa umtshato wabo. Iqabane labo linokubava betsala umva kwaye bazame ukuzibandakanya nabo ngakumbi, oko kunokubangela iimpikiswano, okanye ukubuyela umva ngokunjalo, oko kunokukhokelela kulwalamano olukhulu lobudlelwane.
Iziganeko zoBomi eziBangela iiNgozi eMidlife
Iziganeko ezibalulekileyo zobomi okanye utshintsho olunokubangela ingxaki ebomini. Imixholo eqhelekileyo enokuthi ivele ngokubhekisele kutshintsho olukhulu kubomi ibandakanya ukubuza ukuba ungubani na, ukuzivavanya kwakhona ukubaluleka kwakho, kunye nokufuna ukubeka phambili ukuzonwabisa ngokwemiqathango yakho. Imizekelo yeziganeko zobomi ezinokubangela ingxaki yobomi baphakathi kubandakanywa:
leliphi icala elihamba ngenqanawa phambi kokuthweswa isidanga
- Ukuphulukana nomsebenzi okanye umhlala-phantsi
- Ukubaiindlwana ezingenanto
- Ukuzalwa komntwana
- Ukugula okukhulu okanye imiba yezempilo
- Ukusweleka kwelungu losapho okanye umhlobo osondeleyo
- Ukuba kude neqabane lakho rhoqo ngenxa yomsebenzi okanye ezinye iimbophelelo
- Umhla wokuzalwa onguzero ofana no-50 okanye 60
- Kufuneka uhambe okanye ufuduke
- Ukuhla kwamandla omzimba
Ungayithintela njani ingxaki yobomi baseMidala ukuba ibangelwe luQhawulo-mtshato
Kukho iindlela onokuthi uthintele ingxaki yobomi bangemva kwexesha ekubangeleni uqhawulo-mtshato, nangona khumbula ukuba kuthatha ukuzibophelela kwabo bobabini kumaqabane ukwenza ubudlelwane buphumelele kwaye busempilweni. Eyona meko inokwenzeka kukuba omabini amaqabane azinikele omnye komnye, axhasa utshintsho olunzima kubomi, kwaye bazimisele ukufuna uncedo lwangaphandle, kwiingcali ukuba imiba ayinakusonjululwa. Gcina ukhumbula ukuba iqabane elijamelene nengxaki yobomi bangemva kwexesha linokucela uqhawulo-mtshato, kodwa iqabane labo linokucela elinye ukuba ubudlelwane bonakele.
Ukuba Unengxaki ye-Midlife
Yazi ukuba nantoni na inokubangela ingxaki yakho yobomi, kwaye ayisiyiyo iqabane lakho. Ngelixa iqabane lakho linokudlala indima kwingxaki yakho yobomi obuphakathi, amaxesha amaninzi, kukho ubuqu ngakumbi, iimvakalelo ezinzulu, ukungazithembi kunye noloyiko ekudlaleni. Nangona kunjalo, usenokuziva ungonwabanga emtshatweni wakho ngaphambi kwengxaki yobomi bakho baphakathi, kwaye ukufikelela kweli xesha lotshintsho kunokubangela iingcinga zokufuna uqhawulo-mtshato. Zininzi iindlela onokuhamba ngazo malunga nokuthintela ingxaki yakho yasebusuku ukuba ichaphazele umtshato wakho. Ukuqala:
- Qaphela ukuba unengxaki yobomi baphakathi ebuntwini kwaye uyazi ukuba oku kunokuba lutshintsho kubomi bakho.
- Zinike ixesha lokuqhubekeka neengcinga kunye neemvakalelo zakho ngendlela engagwebanga. Khangela umcebisi okanye ugqirha ngenkxaso eyongezelelweyo ukuba uyafuna.
- Cinga ngento ebangela ingxaki yakho yobomi obuphakathi ngokukodwa (iqabane, ikhondo lomsebenzi, ubudlelwane, usapho, uhambo, ukuzisola ngokubanzi, ukubonakaliswa kukhetho lwakho, uloyiko lokufa ngokubanzi).
- Yazi ukuba unokuba u-projekthi ungazi okanye uphambukise iintlungu zakho zangaphakathi kwiqabane lakho. Oku kunokukhokelela ekubeni uzive uphazamisekile ngakumbi kunye nabo, uziva amanqanaba aphezulu okuba ungonwabi phakathi kwabo, kunye / okanye ufuna indawo engaphezulu.
- Ukuba uziva ukhuselekile kunye neqabane lakho, kwaye uchonge ezona zinto zibalulekileyo, buza ukuba ungathetha nabo malunga nendlela oziva ngayo. Ngaphambi kokuba uthethe nabo, qiniseka ukuba ubazise ukuba ufuna ukuviwa nokuxhaswa, okanye ukuba ufuna bakuncede uze nezisombululo.
- Ukuba uziva ukhuselekile kunye neqabane lakho, bazise ukuba ufuna ntoni ngeli xesha, ukuze ukwazi ukuqhubekekisa ngokupheleleyo okwenzekayo nawe, ngelixa usabonakala kubo. Cwangcisa ungeno olucwangcisiweyo ukuze iqabane lakho lingashiywa lizibuza ukuba uqhuba njani.
- Ukuba nobabini nizinikele emtshatweni wenu, fumani iindlela zokudibanisa eziziva zilungile kuni nobabini. Oku kunokukhangeleka kwahlukile kunangaphambili, okanye nobabini nigqibe kwelokuba ingcebiso ngomtshato yeyona ndlela ilungileyo kuni ngalo mzuzu.
Zinike ixesha lokuqhubekeka neemvakalelo zakho ngaphambi kokuba uqhawule umtshato. Ungafumanisa ukuba uneminye imicimbi ekufuneka uyenzile echaphazele umtshato wakho, kodwa kungengenxa yomtshato wakho.
Ukuba iqabane lakho linengxaki yokuPhila eMideni
Ukusinda kubunzima beqabane lakho lobomi obuphakathi kunokuziva kunzima, kubuhlungu, kwaye ngathi ulahliwe, ngakumbi xa bekuvalele ngaphandle kwenkqubo yabo. Kubalulekile ukuba ugcine engqondweni ukuba awusoze ukwazi ukulawula iingcinga, iimvakalelo kunye nokuziphatha. Unako, nangona kunjalo, usebenze ekwakheni indawo ekhuselekileyo kwiqabane lakho ukuba liphonononge eli nqanaba ebomini babo. Qalisa ngo:
- Ukukhankanya ukuba uqaphele utshintsho kwindlela abaziphethe ngayo, kwaye ulapha kubo ukuba bafuna ukuthetha.
- Babuze ukuba bafuna ntoni kuwe nakubudlelwane bakho. Ukuba yindawo, hlonipha kwaye uhloniphe iminqweno yabo. Qiniseka ukuba useta umhla wokungena kwakhona.
- Bazise ukuba ulapha kubo kwaye ubaxhase.
- Kuphephe ukuqala iimpikiswano okanye ukutyhala amaqhosha abo, nokuba basebenza ngakumbi kunye nawe. Yazi ukuba oku akubalulekanga ngawe, kodwa kungokuninzi malunga 'nezinto zabo.'
- Ukuba bebekade bekuthintela okanye bekutyhala, baxelele ukuba kubonakala ngathi bangathanda indawo kwaye uzimisele ukubanika yona. Bazise ukuba uvulelekile ukuba unxibelelane kwakhona xa bengathanda.
- Gcina ukhumbula ukuba kwabanye, utshintsho kubomi obuphakathi kubuhlungu kakhulu kwaye boyikisa, kwaye iimvakalelo zinokufuduswa zikhutshwe kuwe. Musa ukufunxwa ekusebenzeni kwabo okungenampilo ngokuzibandakanya kwii-tiffs. Endaweni yoko, bazise ukuba uyabeva, kwaye uya konwaba xa nithetha xa nobabini niziva nizolile.
- Thatha ixesha lokucinga malunga noko ukhululekile kuko. Umzekelo, abanye abanamava engxaki yobomi obuphakathi bayabandakanyekaimicimbi engaphandle komtshato, okanye ezinye iindlela zokuziphatha eziyingozi. Qaphela ukuba uyafuna ukusebenzaukubuyisela umtshato wakhoukuba iqabane lakho likuxelele ngale nto.
- Khathalela wena kwaye ujonge kwinto ekwenza wonwabe. Yazi ukuba ayingomsebenzi wakho ukuba ube ngugqirha weqabane lakho. Le yinto ekufuneka bejongane nayo bebodwa kwaye ngelixa unokubaxhasa, ayisiyakho ukuba ufumanise ukuba yintoni ebangela.
Ngaba iqabane lam liza kubuya emva kwengxaki yobomi obuphakathi?
Imeko nganye yahlukile, kwaye kunzima ukuqikelela ukuba iqabane lakho liza kubuya emva kwengxaki yobomi obuphakathi. Ukuba bemkile ngokwasemzimbeni, banokubuyela ekhaya, kodwa banokubonakala bahlukile kuwe okanye banembono entsha ngobomi onokuthi ungonwabi okanye ungonwabi. Qaphela ukuba ayisiyabo bodwa ukuba bathathe isigqibo sokuba umtshato ngowona ulungileyo kubo, kwaye nawe unelizwi ngokunjalo. Ukuba iqabane lakho lishiye umzimba ukuba liqwalasele ngokwalo, chitha ixesha elithile uqaphela ukuba ufuna ntoni, kwaye yintoni ekonwabisayo njengomntu.
Yintoni uqhawulo mtshato lwasebusuku?
Uqhawulo-mtshato lwakwiminyaka yobomi obudala luqhawulo-mtshato oluboshwe ngokuthe ngqo kwelinye okanye omabini amaqabane afumana iingxaki zobomi baphakathi. Ngelixa uqhawulo-mtshato lusenokubonakala ngathi lulungiso kuyo yonke into evakalelwa kukuba bubulumko kubudlelwane obungalunganga, abo benza esi sigqibo ngokungxama bahlala bezisola kamva.
Ubalo loQhawulo-mtshato lwasebusuku
NgelixaUqhawulo-mtshato luphelele, kwabo bakwiminyaka yobomi obuphakathi kunye neqela eliphezulu, uqhawulo-mtshato luyanda . Uphando lubonisa:
- Kwabo baneminyaka engama-55 ukuya kwengama-64, malunga nama-5 ukuya kweli-11 kwabali-1 baya kuqhawula umtshato.
- Abo baneminyaka engama-65 nangaphezulu, malunga no-2 ukuya ku-6 kwi-1 000 baya kuqhawula umtshato.
- Ye abo baneminyaka engama-40 ukuya kwengama-49 , malunga nama-21 kwayi-1 000 aza kuqhawula umtshato nabo bakumtshato wabo wesibini nabatshate iminyaka engaphantsi kweshumi beqhawula umtshato kumazinga aphezulu.
Olu phononongo luthi abanye abantu bayadinwa bubudlelwane babo njengoko befikelela kwisiqingatha sesibini sobomi babo kwaye bafuna ukugxila ngakumbi kwiimfuno zabo nakwimfuno zabo. Ulwamkelo lwasentlalweni nakwinkcubeko yoqhawulo mtshato luye lwatshintsha kakhulu ekuhambeni kwexesha, lwenza ukuba kwamkeleke ngakumbi ukufaka ifayile yoqhawulo-mtshato.
Ubunzima boQhawulo-mtshato ngexesha lokuPhila nokuzisola
Kulabo baqhubeka noqhawulo-mtshato ngexesha lobomi baphakathi ebudaleni, abanye bafumana ukuzisola okuqhelekileyo. Imeko yesiqhelo yokuzisola ngoqhawulo-mtshato kubomi obufanayo phakathi kokuphila kubi kubandakanya:
ezona ndawo zokuthengela ulutsha
- Ukuzisola ngokwenza buhlungu abantu obathandayo
- Ukuzisola ngokuvumela iimvakalelo ukuba zikhokele izigqibo ezingxamisekileyo
- Ukuzisola ngokufuna yonke into ebomini itshintshe
- Ukuzisolanefuthe kubomi babantwana babo
Ngaba ingxaki yobomi baseMidala ingadala uqhawulo mtshato?
Ingxaki yobomi baphakathi ebusheni inokubangela ukungonwabi kwaye emva koko uqhawulo-mtshato ukuba alwenziwanga ngendlela esempilweni. Ngelixa ingxaki yobomi obuphakathi nendawo ekhokelela ekuqhawukeni komtshato, zikho iindlela wena kunye neqabane lakho eninokusebenza kunye ekomelezeni ubudlelwane benu ukuba nobabini nikhwele.
